A gentleman could, but he doesn't.

Last night I had a very vivid dream about going back to high school. I was caught skipping class. My old middle school gym teacher placed me in handcuffs and took me to a room with other offenders. I also found sixty dollars that was dropped by a freshman. Today I worked, had not that great of a day. I clicked the show desktop button and saw James May wearing a shirt that says "i am the stig" on it. I was cheerful after that. I told Dan I was going to pretend from now on that I am married to James May. I imagined that I was going to go home and he would be playing his baby grand piano and watching some show on Discovery channel on mute, occasionally laughing about how unintelligent the programming actually was. Dan played along and we had chatter about how my conversations would my pretend husband would go. Then I went to the gym and met with my personal trainer. She had me do something called "rolling". It felt good, for the most part. I then went to belly dancing class. I flexed a lot. On the way home I bought Gatorade and beef jerky. I ate the entire bag of beef jerky, save for a small piece I gave to my dog. Now Mike is home and we are deciding on what to eat. He just discovered that he bought a tampered-with carton of milk.